Because the Due Date Approaches, Panic Units In

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Picture through Flickr/ DafneCholet

I’m having a child tomorrow. I’m having a child tomorrow. Tomorrow, I’ll get up (assuming I’m ready to go to sleep in any respect tonight, which, primarily based on my present anxiousness degree, does not appear doubtless), head to the hospital, and ultimately emerge with one other member of our household.

Why, sure, that is me, wringing my fingers, desperately attempting to not panic.

Theoretically, we’re ready. The automotive seat is put in, the crib is up, he has garments to put on, diapers to soil, and his large sister has a Huge Sister bag able to go together with treats and trinkets to maintain her occupied within the ready room.

It is me. I am not ready.

As soon as I maintain my son in my arms, all of my fears will dissipate, similar to they did once I laid eyes on my daughter for the primary time.

What ought to I do, on this, my final day because the mom of 1? Ought to I spend my each waking hour enjoying with my 2-year-old, since this would be the final time we are able to earlier than I’ve my consideration break up? Ought to I spend the day in mattress resting, stress-free, and having fun with the sleep I’ll quickly now not be getting? Ought to I spend it cleansing? (Ha, yeah proper.)

It is not simply the issues I’ll now not have the ability to do which might be worrying me—it is also the stage of life I’m about to enter for the second time: the new child section.

Do I bear in mind tips on how to maintain a new child? Are altering boy diapers that totally different and harder than lady diapers? What if he has colic? What if he is too large for new child garments, and he does not get to put on all the lovable outfits I’ve ready for him?

What if, what if, what if!?

That is me at this time. Only a swirl of questions, apprehension and nerves.

Beneath it, I swear, I’m completely over the moon to fulfill my little man  and to lastly squeeze him gently and inform him that mommy is right here to guard him—one thing I’ve wished to do since discovering out in regards to the kidney situation he was recognized with at 20 weeks gestation. I can also’t wait to expertise labor with my husband by my facet this time, not hundreds of miles away on a army base in a fight zone. And I’m giddy to see how my daughter reacts to assembly her child brother. Hopefully that goes nicely. Fingers crossed.

As soon as I maintain my son in my arms, all of my fears will dissipate, similar to they did once I laid eyes on my daughter for the primary time.

However, proper now, on the floor, is delicate panic. 



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